He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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