He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Randomize