she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
