sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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