there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Randomize
