Nicole vs. Life
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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