True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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