Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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