Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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