i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize