so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
