the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
