Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
