it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
