yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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