i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize