Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
