Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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