Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize