His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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