Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
