I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
