you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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