If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
