In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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