wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
