You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
