You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
My dad just said "fuck circus"
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
