he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
