GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
