mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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