Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
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