I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
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