i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
