im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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