I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize