WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize