i would punch a child for taco bell
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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