so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I'm really into asian looking animals
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
