"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
