We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
