wakey wakey hands off snakey
Just cropdusted the office
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize