I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
