Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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