I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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