yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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