i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
