I wish I only lived at night.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
