this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
