I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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